Do it! Just DON'T dump emotional vomit on each other.
A common way people often dishonor their relationship is by venting with the wrong people. When you have a conflict, be careful who you vent to. Venting can be very healthy, IF you do it with the right people and in a clear context.
Don’t vent to your beloved. They likely have their own triggers. Get the uglies out, but don’t get emotional vomit all over your beloved and your relationship. Get yourself straight first. Own your own upset. Identify what is really going on on YOUR side before you approach your beloved.
Don’t vent to friends or family who will take you too seriously. Be wary of seeking validation and sympathy. Reach out to someone who will listen to you AND your beloved as great, just human.
If you’re triggered, vent to someone who will both listen and not listen to you. Meaning they will hold a compassionate space for you and ALSO hold your beloved in compassionate regard as well. They will take your frustrations in stride, knowing we all get frustrated and say things we do not mean. Best to get it out with someone else and not blow up on your beloved later. Or get yourself a pro with a Venting for Victory personalized coaching session.
It’s all too easy for you to forgive and move on, but your friends and family won't be as forgiving. You’ll have built up an unfavorable image of your beloved that may be hard to recover from.
Live and love from a clear vision of what you want, THEN look at the “problems” ONLY as to how they might get in the way of what you really want.
Wouldn't it be easier, more enjoyable and so much less draining to focus on SOLUTIONS rather than getting "stuck in the muck" or dissecting dramas?
Wouldn't it be easier, more enjoyable and so much less draining to focus on SOLUTIONS rather than getting "stuck in the muck" or dissecting dramas?
Can you imagine the difference in your relationship and day to day life if you were focused as allies aiming for awesome rather than adversaries at odds over every little thing?
When one beloved blames, the other beloved defends. It’s relationship math. Then you’re on a slippery slope that can easily turn a misunderstanding or bad day into a messy fight with deep and lasting impact.
ENOUGH "problem pathologizing". Embark on a guided adventure that will keep you focused on what you want and stop you from wasting your finite energy on arguing about everything you DON’T want. The problems will get handled. Just from a different perspective - as obstacles to the actual goal, not the problems being the focus themselves.
Blaming, shaming, complaining and criticizing
Your communication is adversarial and pulls you apart
Fear + frustration are the norm - the fights are “dirty”
Not hot for each other - the sex is “clean” or rare
In for your own happiness - winning is for one
Feeling unsafe, unaccepted or unappreciated
Not trusting each other
Sad / hopeless over the state of your relationship
Others notice the quality of your love - your relationship is a source of embarrassment. (“That” couple)
Don’t like each other or your life very much
Problem solving is a natural byproduct of your efforts
Your communication brings you together as allies
The fights are “clean”
You’re hot for each other and the sex is “dirty”
You prioritize BOTH. It’s win-win or no deal
You express yourself fully and feel fully accepted
You feel seen, heard, appreciated and cared about
You trust each other
Others notice the quality of your love - your relationship is a source of inspiration. (“It” couple)
You like each other and your life
Like each other/like your life
Problem solving/fights clean
Hot for each other/sexy dirty
Care for each other
See & accept/embrace each other
Trust each other
For others/what it looks like "IT Couple"
Don't like each other/don't like your life
Fears, frustrations / dirty fights
Not hot for each other / (sex clean)
Not caring about each other's happiness
Not feeling safe / accepted / appreciated
Not trusting each other
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Identify your ideal relationship, see where your ideals align, then build a map, writing meaningful goals and relationship mantra.
“Very quick and memorable testimonial from one of your clients.”
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“Very quick and memorable testimonial from one of your clients.”
Customer name
Job title, company
Break the habit of blaming, shaming or complaining. Lean into Loving Better by aiming for awesome today. Create YOUR relationship vision then turn your lofty goals into everyday realities.
GET STARTED HERE!With the Full Limo Ride, you get the best of the best of everything on this program. You’ll get 4 personalized coaching sessions with Gaby, access to text her at any time and she does the merging and condensing for/with you. PLUS extras like a personal vision video created for you, a Fights Clean, Sex Dirty Tool Kit filled with fabulous fun, personalized magnets of your vision as well as screensavers of your vision and goals.
Show up. Lean in. Focus on what you want, (not what you don’t want). Have fun.
Yes, this program qualifies to break payment up into two months, half to start, half before we finish, with a small processing fee.
If you can’t make a session, Gaby can usually reschedule if you have notified her in advance. Still, For Better Love offers a 100% money back guarantee. NOTE: Not once has someone asked for a refund!
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